At some I planned on making a new header for this blog… but it has yet to happen.  Of course after my massive photoshop brush downloading spree… I have more than enough inspiration and materials to do so.  I am also just debating subscribing to wordpress’s custom thingy so I can make the blog look like i want it.

I need to hurry up and go to bed.  4 hours or less of sleep isn’t going to get me very far.

Posted an ad on craiglist in my area about doing photography services for free to build up my portfolio.  We’ll see what happens.  It’s exciting to some degree… never wracking on another… and on yet another level… I feel like I won’t get any responses.  Heh.

Quite the optimist I remain.  Yup.  *cough*

My theme for life lately has been MOVING FORWARD.  Guess that is what I am supposed to do when it comes to making a new path huh?  My path currently has a big circle treaded into it where I have circled around and around in same bullshit for much too long.

Also do you want to know where I have gotten a lot of life philosophy from?  The Dog Whisperer lol  Since watching that show I realize how much people are like dogs (or maybe dogs are like people)  and how much we can learn from our animal friends.

He’s always talking about if you move the dog forward it gets past its anxieties and hang ups.  Dude… seems to work for people too.

So yeah that is what I’ve been doing lately.  When I get stuck on something I just push through and move on the best i can, rather it be a situation or a thought or whatever.  Most of the time, I find that whatever it is, pushing through it empowers me.  Sometimes I feel like smacking myself  upside the head and have *dumbraycheldumbraychel* thoughts but I’m getting better.  I’m learning that it is okay if I don’t always know the appropriate response to something and hell, even learning that sometimes its okay if I make a total fool of myself… people rarely remember anyways.  We are the ones who hang on to that kind of crap way longer than anybody else does.

As I wrote in my real life paper journal the other day… mostly it is the day to day little things that give me hang ups…. that I have to push through.  I handle those big things…. exceptionally well.  Which in a way is amusing.  Little things throw me for a loop… big things I sail through.  Maybe I should just approach everything as life or death… oh wait that is what got me into most of my messes anyways lol

Well normally I have been forcing myself to write in my real life journal every night because I have found that it really is the best therapy for me but I guess this will have to count for now because I must go sleep, although I’m starting to think at this point sleep might do more harm than good.  Ugggh.


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